Now we’re in December, there’s been a bit of discussion over whether Die Hard is a real Christmas film.

The real question should be: Is the Christmas Wedding Planner a real film?

I happened to watch this the other day as I was cleaning and sorting Christmas stuff as Netflix stuck it right in my face. No one expects much from a Christmas film, but this is truly one of the worst things I have ever subjected my eyes to. The ‘plot’ (and I use that word loosely) is that a woman plans her cousin’s wedding, her first client after setting up a wedding planning business and a private investigator tries to ruin the wedding.

The PI does end up ruining the wedding, so the wedding planner ends up marrying him (whom she met a couple of days prior) at the same ceremony, using the jilted bride’s bouquet and organist. The original bride doesn’t even seem that irritated that the man she married has knocked up the maid. Or in fact, that there is a maid in this day and age.

The nonsensical plot isn’t even the worst bit. The acting is atrocious.  The main character keeps repeating the ludicrous mantra “I am a fierce warrior” and texting someone who died before mobile phones were invented. There are oodles of scenes in empty restaurants. All of the bridesmaids are no more than cliches. There’s a scene where the main character ignores the barista and another where a lobster is served up less than a minute after it was ordered.

 

boyle

And yes, Die Hard is a Christmas movie…..

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